General

For the wedding guest after a Hello Kitty gift there’s a whole gamut of goods on offer; however, from tomorrow, Sanrio is offering the option of a wedding witnessed by the famous feline herself, along with her rather less distinguished date, Daniel — all for the suitably ceremonial sum of 75,600 yen (708 dollars).

But not in person unfortunately, although the carefully carved look-alikes produced from pictures will allow any Kitty-loving couple to feel that the all-powerful one was actually present. Her face, were it to have any features, presumably wishing them a fun-filled future.

As well as a lifetime spent amassing similarly meaningless merchandise.

Possibly due to the phenomenal success of the Billy’s Boot Camp, Sanrio has opted to add its favourite feline’s face to one of the few products left lacking one — the Slender Shaper.

A cute as can be waist wobbler that is perfect for easing the effects of year end excesses. And it also comes with a free face towel.

Plus if all that wasn’t enough, prolonged use of the thing apparently produces an appearance as appealing as this one.

The vibration loving pussy maybe even allowing the purchaser to squeeze into a pair of Hello Kitty pants.

Perhaps.

(Big thanks to Ken for the tip)