Tokyo Times

Jul 12 2004 5 Comments

Tattoo titillation

The Kanou sisters are famous for 4 things.

Yes, you’ve guessed it, their unfeasibly large breasts.

But Kyoko, the older of the two, has decided to add a fifth reason. As in a new photo collection due to be released on the 16th of this month, the big-busted celebrity will reveal a new tattoo. And somewhat outrageously in an area that one women’s weekly referred to as the star’s V-zone. This photographed area is apparently clean-shaven, and adorned with a butterfly. One that is brightly coloured, has wings formed by rose petals, and a body shaped like a heart.

Yet don’t for a minute think that Kyoko is merely a large chested model with a racy tattoo. Because she’s also a talented artist, as she claims to have designed the tattoo all by herself.

“I gave the orders about the colors to use, like pink and blue, and the right angle for the tattoo, making sure that it would look beautiful when I spread my legs. Just like how it’s beautiful to gaze at a well made-up face, I wanted to express myself beautifully between my legs.”

And if that wasn’t a little too much information, in regards to her lack of hirsuteness she said, “It’s common now for Hollywood celebrities to shave their pubes. It’s all about grooming and appearance.”

It’s just a pity the sisters don’t seem to consider their grooming and appearance when consistently opting for some of the worst 80’s style haircuts in the business.

And before you ask, I have no idea who the character on the right is!

Jul 11 2004 4 Comments

Soporific shogi

It’s probably true to say that wherever you find yourself in the world, daytime TV is decidedly dull. And that’s being generous. So it came as no surprise to find that in this respect Japan is no different from anywhere else. Insipid presenters, countless food based bore-fests, and hour upon hour of housewife dramas are your daily staple should you find yourself at home on a weekday afternoon.

But even these sleep inducing efforts at entertainment pale into comparison when pitched against the boredom behemoth that is televised shogi. Click on the picture below for a small snippet of this disturbingly dull excuse for distraction, and I challenge you to get to the end without at least stifling a yawn.

Jul 08 2004 5 Comments

Sumo shimmy

It’s sumo time once again, with the current tournament being held in Nagoya. And to celebrate 15 days of televised action, here is a picture I took in Tokyo a few years ago.

Before the wrestlers do their stuff, they enter the arena and show themselves off on the dohyo. Yet perhaps the most surprising aspect of this ritual is when all the wrestlers very daintily lift up their kesho-mawashi (the ceremonial aprons they are wearing in the picture).

To see these big and imposing men performing such a feminine looking act is fascinating to say the least. And whilst it’s a word not often associated with sumo, perhaps the best way to describe it is cute.

Which is very dissimilar to the decidedly un-cute, but supremely talented yokozuna, Asashoryu.

Jul 07 2004 4 Comments

Spending more than a penny

The old expression, spending a penny, unfortunately didn’t ring true for a 66-year-old Aichi Prefecture native. As last Sunday, whilst relieving himself at the side of a road, a thief approached the old man from behind, blindfolded him with a towel, and stole his wallet.

Sadly for the weak-bladdered pensioner, the wallet contained more than a penny. Considerably more in fact. He had been planning to pay off a loan that day, and so had a hefty 1.1 million yen (5,500 pounds) stuffed in his wallet.

Perhaps the only bit of good news for the victim is that the robber was described as being 25-years-old, 170 cms tall, and crucially for the police, wearing white slippers. Now unless the donning of white slippers in public places is common in Aichi, it surely can’t be long before this unfashionable felon is safely behind bars.

Some white slippers yesterday.

Jul 06 2004 5 Comments

A room with(out) a view

It’s a commonly asserted stereotype that the Japanese (and especially those residing in Tokyo) live in tiny little houses and apartments. And whilst it has to be said that this is true in a fair number of cases, the situation is not necessarily all that different from many other big cities around the world. I for one distinctly remember my time spent looking for accommodation in London, and being surprised at some of the box-like abodes on offer. Although perhaps more surprising was the inordinately expensive rent that was being charged for such compact apartments.

So whilst in this respect Tokyo may not be that dissimilar to many other big cities, don’t expect Tokyo Times to shy away from reinforcing tried and trusted stereotypes. Especially as the other day I came across this little lodging.

Now I don’t know how an estate agent would go about promoting a place like this, but I guess for starters you could say it is a detached property. And whilst it’s not all that clear in the photograph, the house is situated next to a clean and relatively pretty river. Although unfortunately due to a lack of windows, there won’t be much of a view.

So shall we start the bidding?

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