Photographs from a small group of islands
Whilst just about interesting enough in itself, the picture below also offers the relatively rare opportunity of using the words bust, helmet and chopper in the same sentence. Although it goes without saying that such dreadful double-entendres have no place whatsoever on Tokyo Times.
Click on the image for an, ahem, enlargement.
Exposing one’s genitalia in public to random strangers is admittedly far from normal, yet if that was all he’d done, Osama Tsuji would probably be labeled as nothing more than a bit of a pervert. His extra curricular activities only fit for inclusion in a local publication. Even then just on slow news days.
Unfortunately, flaunting his old fella to unsuspecting passersby turns out to be nothing more than a party piece of sorts for the 35-year-old, his real ‘passion’ being licking young girls’ tongues. Yes, as bizarre as it sounds, Tsuji admitted to the practice after his arrest for indecent exposure in Gifu Prefecture. The medical equipment company employee getting caught revealing his private parts to a 35-year-old housewife as she came out of an elevator.
Yet to pursue his tongue related tendencies, Tsuji-san eschewed loitering around lifts and instead approached young girls (aged between 7 and 10 years old) near apartment buildings. Then once accosted, he would ask his victims to stick out their tongue — which he would promptly lick. The Gifu native allegedly assaulting over 20 youngsters in this freakish manner.
In an apparent attempt to explain his behaviour, Tsuji told investigators that, “I was on bad terms with my wife, and was frustrated.”
Electronic aids are nothing new in the Japanese home, with devices available for a variety of tasks — including entertaining children and caring for the elderly.
Some manufacturers, however, have decided to move away from such practical concerns, focusing much more on personal pleasure. This, erm, mechanical masturbator being a prime example.
For frustrated fellas reticent to subject their genitalia to a rather severe looking synthetic squeeze, the appliance comes with other, slightly less alarming attachments.
Removal of the ‘hand’ for example allowing for straightforward insertion, with the machine kindly taking care of all necessary movements.
Such versatility making it a real a bargain at only 34,500 yen (170 pound). Comfortably beating the competition hands down.
Having grown-up with such highbrow comedy as Benny Hill and the Carry On films, I’m in no way averse to a cheeky bit of insinuation or the occasional double entendre. Far from it in fact, I am English after all.
Yet after years of chuckling furtively at barely concealed references to genitalia and sexual intercourse, my search for the ultimate innuendo may well have reached its zenith — yes, climax even. The mischievous little gem unearthed in a small shop in suburban Tokyo of all places.
A find that leads me to believe that last year’s ban on the sale of used underwear may well have been withdrawn.
The sale or purchase of used underwear has been banned in Tokyo for quite some time now, but it seems nearby Kanagawa Prefecture has substantially stiffened its laws governing such practices; making even the encouragement of used panty purchasing illegal. This hitherto unknown adjustment in the regulations becoming news after a 24-year-old man was arrested for pestering several schoolgirls to sell him their panties.
The students stated that the as yet unnamed man followed them in his car for about 140 metres, continually offering to buy their underwear. Allegedly entreating the girls with such pleas as, “Your skirt is caught up. I’ll buy your panties for 1,000 yen and your bra for 500 yen. Sell ’em to me.”
As embarrassing as this whole episode is, the young gentleman in question admitted to the allegations, claiming, “I had no idea what I was doing was a crime. They were wearing really short skirts and I got all excited. I didn’t want new panties, I wanted used ones.”
The ‘used’ part of this confession will presumably be the panty perverts downfall, as the Kanagawa Prefectural Government ordinance aimed at providing youth with a wholesome upbringing, clearly states that it is forbidden to sell, or encourage to sell, any used underwear belonging to under18s that contains traces of faeces, urine, saliva or other bodily fluids.
A law that it has to be said contains more than enough information.