Tokyo Times

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Lavatorial letch

Over the weekend, a man was arrested at Kansai International Airport after being found in the ceiling above a women’s toilet.

A security guard noticed that somebody had climbed up into the ceiling cavity of the car park toilets, and promptly alerted the police. After his subsequent capture and arrest, the 50 year old suspect Shuichi Arai said he had climbed up there in an effort to escape from somebody who was chasing him.

Thankfully it would appear that I’m not the only one who thinks that the ceiling of a public toilet is a decidedly odd escape route, as inspectors strongly suspect that Mr. Arai’s motive was to spy on women using the toilet.

And just to add to the suspect’s embarrassment, rescue workers had to be called out, as he’d managed to get himself trapped in the maze of pipes above the ceiling.

In the news report, Mr. Arai’s marital status wasn’t disclosed, so it’s unknown if he’s had to explain his conduct to a dismayed and disgusted spouse. However he does have a job. Just imagine the shame of going back to work after being rumbled for spying on women using the toilet. It doesn’t even bear thinking about does it?

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Robotic rapture

When it comes to gadgets I find it very hard to resist, and if it wasn’t for the hefty price tag, I’m sure I’d have been the proud owner of a Sony Aibo a long long time ago. When it comes to animals though, a lot of people feel that having a robotic pet is odd to say the least. And so wouldn’t even consider getting one.

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Now I’ll readily admit that pretty much all the points put forward by those supporting real pets over robotic ones are valid, and I can’t really argue with any of them. But this picture I saw yesterday of some hospitalized kids playing with an Aibo proves that such pets aren’t all bad. The sheer joy on the children’s faces is there for all to see.

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But before I get uncharacteristically sentimental, I should move on and say that the use of robotic pets in Japan is not just restricted to kids. Professor Toshiyo Tamura has done extensive research on the effects of robotic therapy on elderly patients, and he has found that whilst useful, older people prefer robots that are furry and huggable. So as you can see from the picture below, the professor has got around this problem by wrapping an Aibo in a cuddly little coat.

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But for his patients’ sake, I hope he doesn’t intend using those scary looking dolls on the left as part of his research. Just looking at them makes me feel uneasy, and I don’t care how furry their coats may be, I certainly wouldn’t want to be hugging one those devilish looking things. Especially if their eyes move!

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Pimping pubescent

A 16-year-old high school girl was arrested this week for attempting to pimp out one of her classmates.

The entrepreneurial youngster placed an advertisement on an internet dating site. Simply saying, “I’ll introduce girls to you.” Perhaps unsurprisingly her scheme quickly paid dividends, and five men responded to her offer. True to her word she then introduced them to her friend (separately I presume), and pocketed between 20,000 and 30,000 yen from each man.

Easy work if you can get it. Providing you can dodge the authorities of course.

So ladies, I’ll introduce slightly over the hill, pot bellied gentlemen to you. Prices starting from 15,000 Yen. Discretion guaranteed. Quality of service not.

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Governmental gastronome

“Everyone would be healthy if they kept eating this kind of food.”
Prime Minister Junichiro Koizumi, after he and his cabinet members ate elementary school lunches consisting of barley rice, fried pork, boiled root vegetables and milk.

It’s often said that politicians are out of touch with real life. And judging by the above quote, the Prime Minister has managed to prove it quite admirably.

Can he really be talking about this slop?

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I have the rather unenviable task of eating this healthy food 5 days a week. I think it’s quite clear that Mr. Koizumi does not.

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Religious Rockefeller

In Japan, all shrines, temples, and sacred sites have a box for visitors to make monetary offerings. From my occasional observations, most people seem to drop a low denominational coin in before praying. And from a few sneaky peeks into the dark depths of various offertory boxes, there is sometimes the odd note in there too, but usually not many.

However to research this fully, I should have visited Usuki, in Oita prefecture. As on April 14th, a total of 920,000 Yen was collected in 2 offertory boxes at the sacred Buddhist site pictured below.

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Shocked officials said that daily offerings were generally somewhere between 10,000 and 30,000 Yen, and were made up of mostly coins, with only the occasional note being found. So the amount on the 14th took everybody by surprise. Masato Fujimaru from the city’s tourist office said, “This scale of offering is unprecedented. I guess someone who had his prayers answered offered the money out of gratitude.”

Whatever those prayers were, all I can say is that they must have been asking for something pretty substantial. 920,000 Yen is almost 5,000 Pounds!

Now whilst slightly different, this story reminded me of a temple I went to in Kamakura. It was built in a small cave that had a tiny stream running through it. And unbeknownst to me before I went in, it is unique in that it’s considered good luck to wash your money in the running water. Doing this and saying a few prayers is said to bless you with an unexpected financial windfall. Although sadly there were no details as to how much money you could hope to expect.

So before you could say gullible, I was down on my hands and knees next to the stream, frantically scrubbing the few coins I had with me. But glancing to my left, I soon realized that I was merely an amateur (or alternatively not desperate enough), as beside me was a middle-aged man carefully washing a substantial wad of notes. There were no measly coins for this fella. And judging from his expression, he wasn’t just doing it for a bit of fun. He was deadly serious, and looked like he really needed that extra money. I just hope he had a bit more luck than I did, as my promised windfall has yet to materialize.

Maybe we’d both have been better hanging around Buddhist statues in Usuki. Or more accurately, Buddhist statue’s offertory boxes!